Friday, August 7, 2009

OK, so I caved

So I gave in. Finally. I read the Twilight books. There were many reasons why I did NOT want to read them:
1. They sounded so ridiculous.
2. I have an unreasonable fear of vampires. Yes, I know they are not real, but really—sucking blood? Ick.
3. They sounded SOOO ridiculous.
4. My unreasonable fear began as a child, when my brother (not even ME) had a nightmare about my mom turning into a vampire. Just his description was enough to send me into a downward spiral of checking my closets and sleeping with the blankets rolled up around my neck (as if THAT would stop the bloodsuckers) well into my teenage years. Pay no attention to the fact that I still roll the blankets up by my neck. It’s just a habit. Really.
5. The story just sounded so amazingly ridiculous.
6. Vampires are SCARY!
Ok, so that is really just two reasons repeated 3 times, but aren’t they good enough?

There is ONE reason why I decided to read them. When we were thinking of baby names, I told my family we were thinking of Isabella for a girl and my cute sister-in-law looked at me conspiratorially and said “Oh, because of Twilight!” I about had a heart attack. I didn’t know anything but the basics of the book and I didn’t know any names. So I decided if there is going to be a whole slew of Mormon Isabella’s, then I should read up about her.

I must say, I went into the books with very low expectations. They were better than I thought, but still not great. And I decided I don’t much like the name Isabella any more. She was a real idiot. Seriously--pushing and pushing her boyfriend to do dangerous things, curling up in a ball and giving up on her own life out on the mountains when he broke up with her (and how can she be so clueless and to not understand why they should be apart), oh just so many things she did and said that made me cringe. But, overall, the books were somewhat fluffily entertaining and have been keeping me busy for the last few weeks. John kind of rolled his eyes at me, and assumed I’ve turned into one of those obsessed fans. Not so. I understand (kind of) the appeal and the craze among teenagers. Who didn’t wish for a gorgeous boy to be so totally obsessed AND in love with you that he put your happiness and virtue before his own desires and (ick) appetites? And to have another boy worship you enough to just be a friend because that's all you'll let him be? But the basics of the story still turn me off: vampires? She WANTS to become a vampire and sulks when Edward won't bite her? Can’t comprehend that. Sorry “Bella”. No one in my family will be named after you.